Rusty Baker, a fellow New Cumberland resident and one of the first people to be nice to me when I moved to Pennsylvania 20 years ago, turned to the internet for help with a groundhog in August. He posted the below ad on Craigslist and then posted about the experiment on his myspace page. An excellent writer, Rusty’s blog offers tales of other CL/Myspace experiences, canoeing and living in general: (photo courtesy Matt MacGillivray)
This ad was actually on Craigslist for some time until some punk reported it:
Punxsutawney Phil
-Free groundhog.
In my garden at night, under the neighbor’s shed by day.
Must pick up, will not deliver.
Location: New Cumberland
it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Rusty later posted his take on the comments below on some of the reactions to his the ad:
Do You Hate Art About Process?
My CL post about groundhog problems brought a mixed bag of emails, none of which I responded to:
-Hahahhaha – will not deliver – hahaha. funny. Btw, I understand it is illegal to trap and relocate a groundhog so be careful. Maybe we can swap groundhogs – we have two fat ones…
(a trifle politically correct, warning me about the LAW and such)
-LOL…… If you find a collector please send them to my house , we must have a dozen this year !!!
I’d Love to Donate them ALL along w/ the chipmunks .
(Chipmunks AND groundhogs? Seriously. Are you f***ing feeding them?)
-Thank you very much!!! Your ad brought huge belly laughs from my girlfriend and myself. If more people would post things like this instead of scams and fraud, the world would be a much better place. Thanks again!
(My favorite although my post was technically fraud and scam)
-Loved your post… but groundhogs are not nocturnal. You may have a masked bandit to contend with (raccoon). If you have a clear hole around/under your shed, then it probably is a ground hog and you are just missing him during the day time. He could be out anytime from early morning to about 5 – 6 p.m.
(Mr. Zoology corrects my joke. He was unable to suspend his complete and thorough understanding of Groundhog Life)
-I have Bugs Bunny in my yard, and he does the same routine, nice to see someone has a sense of humor. Thanks for the laugh.
(My second favorite)
-i’ll trade our skunk for your groundhog !
(No!)
-shoot the damn thing
(Not politically correct)
-If you want to get rid of the bugger, soak some rags in ammonia, put them in plastic bags and shove them down tightly in his burrows.
dirty cat litter works best but ammonia can work too. you must use a lot. When they try to dig the bags out of their burrows, the bags break and the ammonia flood their burrows with chlorine gas.
(Who am I, Hitler? I will not gas a groundhog to death)
-I’ve seen him in my yard too!!!
(My third favorite)
3 Comments
Though I think blowing up groundhogs would be the most fun, you can heat the asphalt in front of your home or near a road. Ever notice groundhogs always meet their maker on two lane roads. They lie on the streets at night to keep warm. Run a line underground just like you would for a light. Hook the leads to some radiant mesh place under the asphalt. NO MORE GOPHERS. Could you add squirrels to your list, they ate the wires to my car and ruin most gardens. Oh the days when you could just shoot them.
Oh, one more! German Short-haired Pointer. I had one named Willie but it really should have been Groundhog killing machine. He virtually wiped out the population at Shank Park in Hummelstown. I joked I should list him under pest control in the Yellow Pages.
So who says that it’s illegal to trap and relocate groundhogs? When I contacted the PA Game Commission a couple summers ago I was given the green light to trap and relocate groundhogs away from the garden.